The original post by the name ‘Make Good, Make Do’, written on the 5th January got lost due to a server upgrade, so this is a resurrection of the salient points, more for the record but also there was a valuable tool in there that should be on this website.
The tool was not an app or an object but a technique. A good word for it is ‘reframing’.
Reframing is looking at a situation and deciding to view it in an empowering and useful way. It doesn’t involve changing events, only the way we view them.
The following example shows how this works in practice:
A woman who had been suffering from depression was asked to write down the voices in her head that kept repeating.
Voice 1 (‘career woman’) ‘I could have had a successful career as a journalist, but looking after my 2 kids was more important.’
Voice 2 (‘frustrated housewife’) ‘How can you be sure that you could have handled a career when you’re struggling to look after 2 kids?’
She was then asked to write down the voices in the following form:
When a, then I feel b, because I am needing c, therefore I would like d.
Voice 1 ‘When I think about what I could have done with my life, then I feel disappointed, because I am needing recognition of my talents, therefore I would like to start writing freelance articles in the valuable spare time that I have‘.
Voice 2 ‘When the kids don’t listen to me, then I feel angry, because I am needing more support from my husband, therefore I would like to have a childminder once a fortnight so I can have a day off.‘
If there’s a silver lining to every cloud, then applying a little alchemy can go a long way.
Our job as transformers is complete if we can convert a negative into a positive. This is also the key to personal development. Great strides in inward progress can be made by applying this tool.
It’s basically getting a situation to work for you rather than against you. The tool described is but one of many reprogramming techniques that can be applied. Positive thinking really does work and a little bit of mercy goes a long way in attracting mercy in return.
If we can help ourselves then we are in a position to help others, which is reward in itself.